Today is a windy day. the trees are dancing yet it is too afraid to be carried out and leave their roots and die. the sun is hopeless as she cannot do anything about. the air is talking and it must be heard. I am sitting looking behind the window and thinking what is happening and how many have suffered the most. my mood and the wind is alike. my feelings are being moved right and left y the wind unable to control them. I wish I were part of the nature to do whatever I want without fearing the consequences. Despite the fear, I love windy days, it forces you to dance and feel the rhythm.
Thursday, March 14, 2019
Monday, October 1, 2018
A Song For You....
Amr Diab - Meaddy El Nas
معدّي الناس بإحساسك، وبالرّقة اللي جوّة عينيك
You exceed everyone by your sensation and the tenderness in your eyes
وعيني عليك يا روحي قلبي مغمضهاش
And my eyes; O’you the soul of my heart, I won’t close them
قدرت خلاص تغيّرني، وأحلى ما فيّا بان في هواك
You finally were able to change me and the best in me appeared in your love
حياتي معاك لآخر يوم لازم تتعاش
My life with till my last day must be lived
وصوتك لما تتكلم فيه حنيّه، بتاخد روحي من روحي لدُنيا بعيد
And the kindness in your voice when you speak, it takes my soul from myself to a world far away
بحسّ براحة وأتطمّن وبِعنيّا، بشوف الحاجة وأنا جنبك جمالها يزيد
I feel comfortable and safe and with my eyes, while I am beside you, I see more beauty in everything around
حبيبي إنت اللي بالدُنيا ومالي عينيا فين ما بكون، وأحلى من كدة قلبي ميتمناش
My love, you worth the world to me and you are enough to me wherever I go. And more beauty than this my heart won’t desire
دخلت حياتي حلّتها ملوّنها بأجمل لون، وكل أيامي من قبلك مبحسبهاش
You made my life sweeter and you colored with the most beautiful color. And all my days before you, I don’t count.
وصوتك لما تتكلم فيه حنيّه، بتاخد روحي من روحي لدُنيا بعيد
And the kindness in your voice when you speak, it takes my soul from myself to a world far away
بحسّ براحة وأتطمّن وبِعنيّا، بشوف الحاجة وأنا جنبك جمالها يزيد
I feel comfortable and safe and with my eyes, while I am beside you, I see more beauty in everything around
معدّي الناس بإحساسك، وبالرّقة اللي جوّة عينيك
You exceed everyone by your sensation and the tenderness in your eyes
وعيني عليك يا روحي قلبي مغمضهاش
And my eyes; O’you the soul of my heart, I won’t close them
قدرت خلاص تغيّرني، وأحلى ما فيّا بان في هواك
You finally were able to change me and the best in me appeared in your love
حياتي معاك لآخر يوم لازم تتعاش
My life with till my last day must be lived
Tuesday, September 25, 2018
Is It over
yes, it is over. my path with you has come to an end. It was so sad and hard very hard admitting that is over for me and him. I was hoping that it would last a life time having you at my side. I am sorry I was wrong. I wanted to be yours but you wanted to be the fault of our relationship. I wanted to be the one but you wanted me to be a toy. I am in shock while you are enjoying your holiday. I am trying to heal my broken heart while you have none.
I should not say this because everyone has its own way of dealing what he or she is going through. I am trying to convince myself that it is over but I cannot. I am still hoping. I cannot do this any more. If he could do this to me than it is easy for him to walk away and I must do the same.
It was not meant to be. we cross each other path but it does not mean that we should walk together, that's what he once told me. I should have believed him and walk away but I kept fighting for this relation because I believe in love despite the odds. Congrats, you were right because you knew that. you should have told me. Why you promise someone with a life time but you know this wont happen, why?
Trust yourself and know that I did what it takes. I said the truth and I am free now.
Monday, March 13, 2017
Advice From A Friend
Dear Miss Mseer,
Listing is an skill that is needed nowadays. to listen is not an easy as you stated, particularly if the topic or the presenter lack effective presentation skills.
However in any case it is important to listen and preserve our patience as matter of respect to the person who put an effort and prepared some topics to present.
Secondly, when you are too much used to field work and much excludes yourself away to the field, you tend to be too much filed oriented thus, get too bored in the office.
As a point to make, I think human being is always anti routine. Meaning to say, we have less tolerance towards repetitive activity and try to change whenever chance arise. therefore it is vital even for someone like you who is lucky to have chance to be in the office and field to balance between the two activities.
Focusing on one is on expense of the other, we need to stay in the office to prepare ourselves for other field and vice versa.
Try to enjoy the journey before reaching the destiny, by doing so, you keep yourself happy with what you have till you reach what you aim at.
Once again, am just so impressed by your writings and wish you get the strength and courage to continue.
Listing is an skill that is needed nowadays. to listen is not an easy as you stated, particularly if the topic or the presenter lack effective presentation skills.
However in any case it is important to listen and preserve our patience as matter of respect to the person who put an effort and prepared some topics to present.
Secondly, when you are too much used to field work and much excludes yourself away to the field, you tend to be too much filed oriented thus, get too bored in the office.
As a point to make, I think human being is always anti routine. Meaning to say, we have less tolerance towards repetitive activity and try to change whenever chance arise. therefore it is vital even for someone like you who is lucky to have chance to be in the office and field to balance between the two activities.
Focusing on one is on expense of the other, we need to stay in the office to prepare ourselves for other field and vice versa.
Try to enjoy the journey before reaching the destiny, by doing so, you keep yourself happy with what you have till you reach what you aim at.
Once again, am just so impressed by your writings and wish you get the strength and courage to continue.
Note: Thank you very much for your advice. I appreciated.
Tuesday, March 7, 2017
Being Sad
Being sad is the most horrible feeling ever. I can feel that I am broken inside out side, and I can feel the pain of my heart broking into pieces. It is like your soul getting out of your body, and you cannot do anything expect feeling the pain of it. I am very sad today because of many things in which most of these many I do not know about.......
I know that I want to change so many things in my life, and I want to achieve one very important goal that it would change my life for ever, but sometimes you want and work hard yet you always miss the finish line. It is tiring, very tiring. I am very tired.
My tiring adds more to my sadness. When I am tired, I cannot enjoy anything because I cannot feel it. I am too tired to enjoy the little and the beautiful things in the daily life. Exhaustion could lead to sadness, depression, and isolation and vice-versa.
Sorrow, exhaustion and isolation are very related to each other because when I am exhausted, I cannot do anything, I isolate myself in which my sorrow would increase. All these complicated feelings will lead you to have a depression. In this way, you would loss so many good moments in life. You would miss your goal and lose all your hard work.
For me, it is very important to deal with my sorrow in a very positive way in which I direct my sadness to my own best. It is very hard to do that, and sometimes it is imposable but it is okay. It is okay to be sad, tired and isolated. From time to time, everybody needs to be left a lone, and it is considered a positive thing in which you rewrite you goals and have a clear path to achieve them.
I am one of the people who have dealt with many sad incidents, and from my prespective, many will cross my path again. I am very spiritual person and I consider myself as a strong believer in which I believe that things happen for a higher purposes. Every sad or bad incident or situation could make a strong person if you want so.
I am sad and tired now, but I know that I will be okay, and I know things will be okay soon. I believe so.........
XOXO
I know that I want to change so many things in my life, and I want to achieve one very important goal that it would change my life for ever, but sometimes you want and work hard yet you always miss the finish line. It is tiring, very tiring. I am very tired.
My tiring adds more to my sadness. When I am tired, I cannot enjoy anything because I cannot feel it. I am too tired to enjoy the little and the beautiful things in the daily life. Exhaustion could lead to sadness, depression, and isolation and vice-versa.
Sorrow, exhaustion and isolation are very related to each other because when I am exhausted, I cannot do anything, I isolate myself in which my sorrow would increase. All these complicated feelings will lead you to have a depression. In this way, you would loss so many good moments in life. You would miss your goal and lose all your hard work.
For me, it is very important to deal with my sorrow in a very positive way in which I direct my sadness to my own best. It is very hard to do that, and sometimes it is imposable but it is okay. It is okay to be sad, tired and isolated. From time to time, everybody needs to be left a lone, and it is considered a positive thing in which you rewrite you goals and have a clear path to achieve them.
I am one of the people who have dealt with many sad incidents, and from my prespective, many will cross my path again. I am very spiritual person and I consider myself as a strong believer in which I believe that things happen for a higher purposes. Every sad or bad incident or situation could make a strong person if you want so.
I am sad and tired now, but I know that I will be okay, and I know things will be okay soon. I believe so.........
XOXO
Monday, February 27, 2017
She is My Son: Afghanistan's Bacha Posh, When Girls Become Boys
She is My Son: Afghanistan's Bacha Posh, When Girls Become Boys
The curious case of 'bacha posh' takes RT to Afghanistan – a
society so patriarchal that a family having several daughters and no
sons is a social stigma that’s impossible to shake. This leads to some
girls being forced to live as boys. Some for life.
“I have seven daughters and no son,” says Mohammed, a father.
His daughter, Amena, sitting nearby, somberly confirms what needs to be done in such cases.
But how do the children cope with such major transformations? Each individual story is unique. We met Fazilya, Asiya, Najla and Amena – all unique young ladies from different backgrounds. One of them, Fazilya, was raised as a boy from birth. Outside her household she is known as Abos.
The benefits of education are obvious. And the family, particularly
the father, can have some peace away from the judgmental public eye.
But how do the children cope with such major transformations? Each individual story is unique. We met Fazilya, Asiya, Najla and Amena – all unique young ladies from different backgrounds. One of them, Fazilya, was raised as a boy from birth. Outside her household she is known as Abos.
It becomes apparent throughout the course of the documentary that limitations don’t always have to be crippling. Some children even enjoy being given the role of a boy, as they walk around in jeans, scale fences and play football with their male friends. Others feel it is the honorable thing to do.
But others yet, like the older Najla Tofan, have a different perspective on life altogether. They have learned in childhood that only men in Afghanistan enjoy any measure of real freedom – the freedom to move about alone, decide what to do and in what order. They retain their femininity and gender identity quite well, even into their late teenage years; at the same time, they never take their eye off the ball, always playing the role of the boy masterfully.
Away from her office work, Tofan teaches Taekwondo in the only girls’ school in the area, hidden away deep in a cellar. When the class is over, she heads to evening school.
“I feel good dressed as a man. I feel stronger. I feel like a man. And I like it.”
While some girls’ identities seem to end up changed irreversibly, others have no problem switching back. When some bacha posh come of age, they go back to dressing as women, while their parents attempt to marry them off – more often than not, to a relative. Tofan is a rare exception. She has pointedly refused to start a family and have children.
Even in deeply-conservative Afghanistan, some choose to accept the choices a girl makes when she seamlessly transitions between her two identities in the course of the day.
Join RT on this journey into Afghanistan to find out just how little you really knew of this fascinating regional custom.
His daughter, Amena, sitting nearby, somberly confirms what needs to be done in such cases.
“Even
though I’m a girl, I must become a boy. I want to do something good for
my family, for my father, that’s why I’m a ‘bacha posh’,” she says.
The Persian phrase ‘bacha posh’ literally translates as ‘dressed as a
boy’. It is a cultural practice in parts of Pakistan, Afghanistan and
Iran, whereby one of the girls assumes the role of a boy, her true
identity only known to her parents and siblings. She dresses as a boy,
plays football as a boy, goes to school - like boys do - and can move
about town freely. Even escort her sisters.
The benefits of education are obvious. And the family, particularly
the father, can have some peace away from the judgmental public eye.But how do the children cope with such major transformations? Each individual story is unique. We met Fazilya, Asiya, Najla and Amena – all unique young ladies from different backgrounds. One of them, Fazilya, was raised as a boy from birth. Outside her household she is known as Abos.
But how do the children cope with such major transformations? Each individual story is unique. We met Fazilya, Asiya, Najla and Amena – all unique young ladies from different backgrounds. One of them, Fazilya, was raised as a boy from birth. Outside her household she is known as Abos.
It becomes apparent throughout the course of the documentary that limitations don’t always have to be crippling. Some children even enjoy being given the role of a boy, as they walk around in jeans, scale fences and play football with their male friends. Others feel it is the honorable thing to do.
But others yet, like the older Najla Tofan, have a different perspective on life altogether. They have learned in childhood that only men in Afghanistan enjoy any measure of real freedom – the freedom to move about alone, decide what to do and in what order. They retain their femininity and gender identity quite well, even into their late teenage years; at the same time, they never take their eye off the ball, always playing the role of the boy masterfully.
Away from her office work, Tofan teaches Taekwondo in the only girls’ school in the area, hidden away deep in a cellar. When the class is over, she heads to evening school.
“I feel good dressed as a man. I feel stronger. I feel like a man. And I like it.”
While some girls’ identities seem to end up changed irreversibly, others have no problem switching back. When some bacha posh come of age, they go back to dressing as women, while their parents attempt to marry them off – more often than not, to a relative. Tofan is a rare exception. She has pointedly refused to start a family and have children.
Even in deeply-conservative Afghanistan, some choose to accept the choices a girl makes when she seamlessly transitions between her two identities in the course of the day.
Join RT on this journey into Afghanistan to find out just how little you really knew of this fascinating regional custom.
A Worried Feeling
A worried feeling in which you cannot get ride of, you do not know what is about or how you got it from the first place. this worried feeling is like a pain in your heart and it keeps hurting you. for me, I always think that something bad will happen to me or anyone close to me in which I keep checking on everyone and keep calling them till this feeling disappear. It is annoying, disturbing, upsetting, uncomfortable, and bothering. I hate it so much that I just want to sleep all day till I lose it; however, I cannot because when you have job and work to do you must live with it. During my work especially when I have this feeling I check my work, emails, and anything I write or do 10 times because I lose my focus and attention.
In my case, I live in Iraq, Baghdad where bad things happen for real such as a suicide bomber, a car bomb, and exploding. Therefore, when I have this feeling in which it is very normal for many people, but for me it is anxiety. It is overwhelming for me because for me it is a sign of awful thing that it may happen. I know, I am very pessimistic when it comes to this worrying feelings. Everyone has it is own perspective on this matter in my case it is one of the worst one.
Still hope, I really do.......
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